The Ants Go Marching One By One

Richard

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I've tried every trick, from spray to sticky traps
Of table and chair, like some mad peg-legged peg
Oh, the ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
But they build their bridges, with bodies of the dead
There's a parade in me kitchen, not of proud men in hats
Cleaning up me crumbs, like a free maid service, hey!
But these six-legged squatters, they're clever little chaps
I've waged a losing war, against this arthropod corps
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em - I'm now a Myrmecologist!
The ants keep marching, one by one
So I'll put down me weapons, and with them I'll coexist
We've reached a truce, some might say it's daft
I've laid out poison, placed boots 'round every leg
But of tiny black insects, marching like bureaucrats
But the ants keep marching, one by one, hurrah
They've claimed me sugar bowl, and now they want me honey jar
In me kitchen, the battle's done
But at least now, the floor's spotless fore and aft!
These kamikaze crawlers, have gone straight to me head
Now I've had an epiphany, as I watch them toil away