When Dacey Rode the Mule

'Twas in a small, up-country town,
When we were boys at school,
There came a circus with a clown
And with a bucking mule.
The clown announced a scheme they had —
The mule was such a king
They'd give a crown to any lad
Who'd ride him round the ring.
And, gentle reader, do not scoff
Nor think the man a fool,
To buck a porous plaster off
Was pastime to that mule.

The boys got on — he bucked like sin —
He threw them in the dirt.
And then the clown would raise a grin
By asking, 'Were they hurt?'
But Johnny Dacey came one night,
The crack of all the school,
Said he, 'I'll win the crown all right,
Bring in your bucking mule.'
The elephant went off his trunk,
The monkey played the fool,
And all the band got blazing drunk
When Dacey rode the mule.

But soon there rose an awful shout
Of laughter, when the clown,
From somewhere in his pants drew out
A little paper crown.
He placed the crown on Dacey's head,
While Dacey looked a fool,
'Now, there's your crown, my lad,' he said,
'For riding of the mule!'
The band struck up with 'Killaloe',
And 'Rule Britannia, Rule',
And 'Young Man from the Country', too,
When Dacey rode the mule.

Then Dacey, in a furious rage,
For vengeance on the show
Ascended to the monkeys' cage
And let the monkeys go;
The blue-tailed ape and chimpanzee
He turned abroad to roam;
Good faith! It was a sight to see
The people step for home.
For big baboons with canine snout
Are spiteful, as a rule,
The people didn't sit it out
When Dacey rode the mule.

And from the beasts that did escape
The bushmen all declare
Were born some creatures partly ape
And partly native bear.
They're rather few and far between;
The race is nearly spent;
But some of them may still be seen
In Sydney Parliament.
And when those legislators fight,
And drink, and act the fool —
It all commenced that wretched night
When Dacey rode the mule.