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In the Park
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In the Park

by Helen Hoyt · English

Helen Hoyt portrait
22 January 1887 - 2 August 1972 (~85)
desire heart women social park internal inner restraint expectations feet

The quiet drama of Helen Hoyt’s "In the Park" unfolds within a deceptively simple narrative framework, capturing a fleeting moment of romantic tension that resonates with the universal complexities of human desire and social performance. At first glance, the poem appears to be a vignette of courtship, a brief encounter between a man and a woman in a public space. Yet, beneath this surface simplicity lies a profound exploration of the dichotomy between external composure and internal turmoil, the performative nature of gender roles, and the intricate psychology of attraction. Hoyt, a poet whose work often navigated the emotional landscapes of early twentieth-century American life, utilizes this seemingly mundane setting to dissect the nuanced interplay of agency, restraint, and longing. The poem stands as a testament to the power of understatement, where what is left unsaid—and what is physically withheld—speaks louder than any grand declaration of love.

To fully appreciate the weight of this poetic moment, one must consider the historical and cultural milieu in which it was written. Helen Hoyt wrote during a period of significant transition in social norms regarding gender and courtship. The early twentieth century saw the gradual erosion of Victorian strictures, yet the expectations placed upon women remained heavily coded in rituals of modesty and reserve. The park, as a setting, is particularly potent in this context. It is a liminal space, neither entirely private nor completely public, where social rules are both enforced and subtly negotiated. It is a stage for visibility, where one is on display, and thus, every action is subject to interpretation. In this arena, the woman’s behavior is not merely a personal choice but a public performance of propriety. Hoyt captures this tension by focusing on the physical separation of the speaker’s body parts—her head, her feet, her heart—suggesting a fragmentation of self that occurs when social expectation clashes with genuine desire.

The poem opens with an auditory invitation: "He whistled soft whistlings I knew were for me." The use of the verb "whistling" rather than speaking immediately establishes a tone of casualness and perhaps even presumption. Whistling is an informal, somewhat intimate gesture, one that bypasses the formalities of verbal introduction. It is teasing, endearing, yet also potentially intrusive. The speaker’s acknowledgment that she "knew" the whistling was for her indicates a pre-existing awareness or connection, suggesting that this is not a random encounter but part of an ongoing dynamic. The adjectives "teasing" and "endearing" reveal the speaker’s internal interpretation of the sound; she is not offended by the informality but rather recognizes the playful intent behind it. This initial recognition sets the stage for the central conflict: the tension between the allure of the invitation and the necessity of maintaining social decorum.

The speaker’s response is immediate and deliberate: "But I did not turn my head." This refusal to look is the pivotal action of the poem, a gesture of negation that defines the speaker’s external persona. By withholding her gaze, she denies the man the satisfaction of immediate engagement. In the language of body politics, the gaze is a form of power; to look is to acknowledge, to validate, and to invite further interaction. By refusing to turn her head, the speaker asserts a measure of control over the situation. However, Hoyt introduces a crucial caveat in the parenthetical statement: "(Only a little I turned my hearing.)" This subtle admission undermines the apparent stoicism of the previous line. While her eyes remain fixed forward, her attention has shifted. The parenthetical format itself suggests a whisper, a secret confession to the reader that contradicts the public facade. It reveals that the resistance is not total; there is a crack in the armor, a small concession to curiosity and interest. This duality—the rigid exterior versus the attentive interior—becomes the structural backbone of the poem’s emotional architecture.

As the poem progresses, the focus shifts from the head to the feet, introducing a personification of the body that serves to distance the speaker from her own desires. "My feet took me by; / Straight and evenly they went." The imagery here is one of mechanical precision and autonomous movement. The feet are described as if they have a will of their own, acting independently of the speaker’s conscious intent. They move "straight and evenly," suggesting a disciplined, almost militaristic adherence to social protocol. The phrase "As if they had not dreamed what he meant" imbues the feet with a kind of innocent ignorance. They are portrayed as naive entities, unaware of the sexual and romantic implications of the man’s whistling. This personification allows the speaker to disavow responsibility for her continued movement away from the man. It is not she who chooses to leave; it is her feet, those unthinking appendages, that carry her past. This dissociation is a common psychological defense mechanism, allowing individuals to navigate situations where their desires conflict with their social conditioning. By attributing the action to her feet, the speaker preserves her self-image as a proper, uninterested woman, even as her heart betrays her.

The generalization that follows—"As if such a curiosity / Never were known since the world began / As woman wanting man!"—elevates the personal experience to a mythic level. Here, Hoyt employs irony to critique the societal denial of female desire. The statement is patently absurd; the desire of women for men is as old as humanity itself, a fundamental drive that has inspired countless works of art, literature, and history. Yet, within the confines of the speaker’s social reality, this desire must be treated as nonexistent, as an anomaly that has "never been known." The exclamation mark at the end of this thought underscores the intensity of the speaker’s internal frustration. It is a cry against the erasure of female agency and desire. The speaker is forced to act as though she is devoid of such "curiosity," performing a role that denies her own humanity. This hyperbolic denial serves to highlight the artificiality of the social codes she is bound by. The poem thus becomes not just a story of a single encounter, but a commentary on the broader cultural suppression of women’s sexual and romantic autonomy.

The final stanza brings the conflict to its resolution, or rather, its unresolved state, by shifting the focus to the heart. "My heart led me past and took me away; / And yet it was my heart that wanted to stay." This concluding paradox encapsulates the essence of the poem. The heart, traditionally the seat of emotion and desire, is depicted as both the agent of departure and the source of longing. Initially, the heart is said to have "led me past," aligning it with the feet in the act of leaving. However, the conjunction "And yet" introduces a reversal, revealing the true nature of the heart’s inclination. It wanted to stay. This contradiction mirrors the earlier split between the head and the hearing, reinforcing the theme of internal fragmentation. The speaker is divided against herself, torn between the social imperative to leave and the emotional imperative to remain.

The ambiguity of the final lines invites multiple interpretations. Did the heart actually lead her away, or did it merely accompany her while longing for the opposite? The phrasing suggests that the physical action of leaving was inevitable, driven by forces beyond the speaker’s control, yet the emotional truth remains intact. The heart’s desire to stay is the authentic response, while the act of walking away is the performed duty. This ending leaves the reader with a sense of melancholy and unfulfilled potential. The encounter ends without resolution, without a word spoken, without a glance exchanged. The silence between the two figures is filled with the weight of what could have been, had social constraints not intervened. The poem captures the tragedy of missed connections, not due to lack of interest, but due to the rigid structures that govern human interaction.

Hoyt’s use of literary devices throughout the poem enhances its emotional impact and thematic depth. The personification of body parts—head, feet, heart—creates a vivid internal landscape where different aspects of the self are in dialogue, or rather, in conflict. This technique allows the poet to explore the complexity of human psychology without resorting to explicit exposition. Instead, the emotions are embodied, made physical through the actions of these disparate parts. The imagery of movement is also significant. The poem is dynamic, filled with motion: whistling, turning, walking, leading. Yet, this motion is constrained, directed by social norms rather than free will. The "straight and even" movement of the feet contrasts with the fluid, ambiguous nature of the heart’s desire, highlighting the tension between order and chaos, control and passion.

Furthermore, the poem’s tone is masterfully balanced between detachment and intimacy. The speaker narrates the event with a certain coolness, observing her own reactions as if from a distance. This objective stance is disrupted only by the parenthetical aside and the final exclamation, moments where the mask slips and the true emotion bleeds through. This interplay between distance and closeness engages the reader, inviting them to look beyond the surface behavior and empathize with the speaker’s internal struggle. The simplicity of the language belies the complexity of the emotions involved, a hallmark of Hoyt’s poetic style. She avoids ornate vocabulary or elaborate metaphors, preferring instead the directness of everyday speech. This accessibility makes the poem relatable, allowing readers to project their own experiences of restraint and desire onto the narrative.

From a philosophical perspective, "In the Park" touches upon existential themes of authenticity and alienation. The speaker is alienated from her own desires, forced to act in ways that contradict her inner truth. This alienation is not self-imposed but socially constructed, a result of the external pressures that dictate appropriate behavior. The poem questions the cost of such conformity, suggesting that it leads to a fragmentation of the self. The speaker is not whole; she is a collection of conflicting parts, each pulling in a different direction. This fragmentation is a poignant reflection of the human condition, particularly for women in a patriarchal society where their identities are often defined by external expectations rather than internal realities.

Comparatively, one might look to the works of other modernist poets who explored similar themes of urban alienation and restrained emotion. The poem shares affinities with the imagist movement, which emphasized clarity, precision, and the use of concrete images to convey complex ideas. Like many imagist poems, "In the Park" focuses on a single, sharp moment in time, capturing its essence without unnecessary elaboration. However, Hoyt’s work differs in its psychological depth and its focus on gender dynamics. While imagists often sought to remove the personal voice, Hoyt retains a strong subjective presence, using the personal experience to illuminate broader social truths.

The emotional resonance of the poem lies in its universality. Anyone who has ever felt the pull of desire against the push of propriety can relate to the speaker’s dilemma. The poem validates the hidden emotions that often go unacknowledged in public life, giving voice to the silent struggles of the heart. It reminds us that behind every composed facade, there may be a storm of feeling, a longing that dares not speak its name. In this way, Hoyt’s poem is not just a historical artifact but a timeless exploration of the human heart’s capacity for both restraint and passion.

Ultimately, "In the Park" is a masterpiece of subtlety and insight. It demonstrates how much can be conveyed through what is withheld, how silence can be more eloquent than speech, and how the smallest gestures can carry the weight of entire social systems. Helen Hoyt invites us to look closer, to listen to the soft whistlings of our own hearts, and to recognize the courage it takes to navigate the complex terrain of human connection. The poem remains a powerful testament to the enduring relevance of poetry in capturing the nuances of our emotional lives, offering a mirror in which we can see our own reflections of desire, duty, and the delicate balance between the two. Through its elegant simplicity and profound psychological acuity, the poem continues to resonate, reminding us that even in the most ordinary moments, extraordinary dramas of the heart are playing out.

I Remember, I Remember
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I Remember, I Remember

by Thomas Hood · English

Thomas Hood portrait
23 May 1799 - 3 May 1845 (~46)
childhood memory world remember garden knowledge

Thomas Hood’s “I Remember, I Remember” is among the most deceptively lucid poems of the nineteenth century. Its diction is plain, its scenes immediately recognizable, and its recurring declaration of remembrance sounds almost like a nursery refrain. Yet the poem’s apparent simplicity encloses a remarkably dark meditation on time, selfhood, mortality, and the painful distance between adult consciousness and childhood perception. Hood does not merely recollect a happy past. He dramatizes the act of recollection as a disturbing encounter between two selves: the child who inhabited a world of radiant intimacy and imaginative freedom, and the adult who can recover that world only through language, while knowing that he cannot return to it. The remembered house, garden, swing, flowers, birds, and trees are therefore more than picturesque details. They become emotional thresholds, each opening briefly onto a lost mode of being.

The poem belongs to the rich Romantic inheritance of childhood recollection, nature imagery, and inward reflection, but it handles those materials with a distinctive sharpness. Romantic writers frequently regarded childhood as a privileged state: a period in which the individual perceived nature with unusual intensity and remained closer to spiritual truth. Hood shares this interest, but he does not offer the consolations that often accompany Romantic memory. His speaker finds no stable healing in the past. Indeed, the loveliness of what is remembered intensifies the speaker’s unhappiness in the present. The poem’s central emotional paradox is that memory preserves beauty only by making loss continually present. To remember is to possess and to be deprived at once.

Thomas Hood’s own life makes this fusion of brightness and pain especially resonant. Born in London in 1799, Hood came from a literary and publishing family, and he developed into a writer admired both for comic ingenuity and for serious pathos. His career was marked by illness, financial strain, and the unstable conditions of professional authorship. Later readers have sometimes approached “I Remember, I Remember” as a direct confession of Hood’s personal melancholy, particularly because the poem’s speaker expresses an unexpectedly bleak wish that death had come in childhood. Such a reading has some force, especially in light of Hood’s difficult adult life, but it should not reduce the poem to biography. The lyric voice is carefully made. Hood transforms private feeling into a broader meditation on what it means to outgrow one’s first world.

The opening memory appears domestic and serene: “The house where I was born,” with “The little window where the sun / Came peeping in at morn.” The house is not described grandly. Its defining feature is a “little window,” a phrase that conveys modesty, enclosure, and child-sized perception. The world first arrives through this aperture. Sunlight is personified as a gentle visitor who “came peeping,” a word that gives the dawn a playful, almost companionable agency. For the child, morning is neither an abstract division of time nor a demand of adult routine. It is a reliable act of visitation, a benevolent presence entering the room.

Hood’s treatment of light is especially important. The sun “never came a wink too soon, / Nor brought too long a day,” and the phrasing suggests a childhood existence in which time seems perfectly proportioned. Morning and daylight arrive neither prematurely nor excessively; they belong to a natural order that once felt hospitable. The statement is more profound than it initially appears. Adults often experience time as pressure: days begin too early, duties extend too long, and the future arrives with unwanted speed. The remembered child, by contrast, lives within time rather than against it. Daylight is not an instrument of labor or anxiety. It is simply the medium of life.

That security is abruptly overturned by the stanza’s final declaration: “But now, I often wish the night / Had borne my breath away!” The force of this sudden descent is one of the poem’s greatest achievements. A reader has been invited into a warm domestic scene and then confronted with a death wish. “Night” is personified as a figure capable of carrying away the speaker’s breath, and the euphemistic delicacy of “borne” does not lessen the statement’s severity. It makes death seem almost like an abduction into sleep, a reversal of the sun’s morning visit. The contrast between dawn and night, arrival and removal, life and extinction, establishes the poem’s governing tension: the very memories that reveal life’s early sweetness also expose the speaker’s present estrangement from it.

This moment must be read with care. Hood does not necessarily ask readers to diagnose the speaker or to interpret the poem as a literal declaration of suicidal intent. Rather, the phrase gives extreme form to an emotional proposition: if adulthood has become a condition of heaviness, disenchantment, and spiritual distance, then it may seem unbearable that the child survived into such knowledge. The poem articulates a fantasy of preserving innocence by preventing its loss. Death, in this logic, would have fixed the child within the lighted world of the early home. It is a grim thought, but its emotional logic is recognizable. Hood refuses to sentimentalize childhood by pretending that its memory is uncomplicatedly comforting.

The garden remembered in the next movement expands the poem’s sensory and symbolic world. “The roses, red and white,” “The vi’lets,” “the lily-cups,” and “The lilacs where the robin built” create an abundant scene of color, scent, delicacy, and life. The language has the freshness of a child naming things with delight. At the same time, the details are specific enough to suggest the precision with which emotionally formative places remain lodged in memory. The garden is not a generic Eden. Its roses have colors; its lilacs host a particular bird; its laburnum is associated with a brother and a birthday. Such particulars matter because memory often survives not as a coherent narrative but as a luminous collection of images, objects, and sensations.

The phrase “Those flowers made of light!” expresses a characteristic movement of the poem: physical objects are perceived through imaginative transformation. Flowers are not literally made of light, but they seem to be so in the child’s vision. The image may evoke sunlight shining through pale petals, yet its larger significance lies in the child’s capacity to experience matter as radiant. Nature is not inert decoration. It is alive with a brightness that exceeds ordinary description. In this respect Hood participates in a Romantic tradition that treats childhood perception as spiritually or aesthetically privileged. The child does not possess more factual knowledge than the adult; rather, the child possesses an intensity of attention that makes the world appear newly created.

Hood complicates this radiant scene through the mention of family. The robin builds “where my brother set / The laburnum on his birthday,” and this brief detail brings human affection into the garden’s natural cycle. A tree planted for a birthday carries an implicit promise of duration: it will grow as the child grows, perhaps outlast the occasion that prompted its planting. The speaker’s exclamation, “The tree is living yet!” is consequently double-edged. On one level, it is a burst of delighted surprise. The laburnum remains, a living witness to the past. On another, it is painful precisely because the tree’s continuity emphasizes human change and separation. The child who watched it being planted is gone, not physically perhaps, but psychologically and temporally transformed.

The living tree also raises a subtle question about memory’s relation to reality. The past has not wholly vanished; an external object endures. Yet the endurance of the laburnum does not restore the speaker to childhood. The tree may still stand, but its meaning has altered because the speaker has altered. This distinction is central to the poem’s mature intelligence. Nostalgia is not simply a wish to revisit an old place. It is the recognition that no return can reproduce the consciousness with which that place was first experienced. The garden remains available in principle, while the child’s mode of inhabiting it remains irretrievable.

The memory of the swing gives Hood an opportunity to explore bodily freedom. The speaker recalls where he “was used to swing,” imagining that “the air must rush as fresh / To swallows on the wing.” This comparison joins the child’s movement to the effortless mobility of birds. Swinging is a modest childhood activity, but Hood turns it into an experience of near-flight. The rush of air creates an exhilarating sensation of release from gravity, and the swallows provide a natural emblem of spontaneity, speed, and seasonal vitality. The child does not merely observe the birds; he measures his own joy against their imagined freedom.

“My spirit flew in feathers then, / That is so heavy now” forms one of the poem’s most memorable contrasts. The statement combines metaphor and bodily sensation with extraordinary economy. The child’s spirit is not said to have flown like a bird; it “flew in feathers,” as though the self had become feathered, airy, and physically capable of ascent. The adult spirit, by contrast, is “heavy.” The word carries psychological, moral, and even theological significance. It suggests sorrow, fatigue, guilt, knowledge, depression, and the downward pull of mortality. The contrast is not merely between youthful energy and adult tiredness. It is between two ontologies: one self seems naturally buoyant, while the other experiences consciousness as weight.

The following image intensifies that bodily distress: “And summer pools could hardly cool / The fever on my brow!” Summer pools conventionally suggest recreation, refreshment, and pastoral ease. Yet in Hood’s recollection they cannot adequately cool the speaker’s “fever.” The image may evoke the physical heat of childhood play, but the poem’s emotional context encourages a wider reading. Fever becomes a figure for inner agitation, a restlessness that nature cannot soothe. Even the memory of summer’s cooling water is touched by excess and discomfort. This complicates any assumption that the poem idealizes childhood as pure, uninterrupted happiness. The child’s life contains intensity so strong that it approaches fever; the adult’s sorrow may be foreshadowed in the child’s susceptibility to overwhelming feeling.

The poem’s final remembered object, the “fir trees dark and high,” gathers its concerns into a meditation on height, knowledge, and heaven. The firs are visually different from the garden flowers and laburnum. Their darkness and verticality make them more solemn, almost sublime. As a child, the speaker believed that their “slender tops / Were close against the sky.” This is an image of imaginative scale. Trees seem to touch heaven because the child sees them from below, but also because the child experiences the world as open to marvelous correspondences between earth and sky. The visible landscape becomes an invitation to transcendence.

When the adult speaker calls this belief “a childish ignorance,” the phrase at first appears to correct the earlier vision. The grown mind knows that treetops do not reach the sky, that physical distance separates earth from heaven, and that appearances can mislead. Yet Hood immediately challenges the adult’s supposed superiority: “But now ’tis little joy / To know I’m farther off from heav’n / Than when I was a boy.” Knowledge has stripped away an illusion, but it has not brought happiness. The poem does not simply celebrate ignorance; rather, it asks what kind of truth is lost when imaginative wonder is replaced by factual mastery. The child’s error may be scientifically naive, but it expresses a spiritual intuition that the adult cannot easily dismiss.

“Farther off from heav’n” is among the poem’s richest phrases because its meaning remains productively uncertain. On the most literal level, the adult is taller than the boy and therefore physically farther from the treetops that once appeared close to the sky. The observation has a faintly comic logic: growing upward has made him, paradoxically, farther from heaven. But the phrase is also moral and spiritual. The adult may feel farther from innocence, faith, imaginative purity, or divine presence. In Christian cultural terms, childhood could be associated with humility and dependence, qualities traditionally linked to spiritual receptiveness. The speaker’s adulthood, with its knowledge and heaviness, seems to have created an inward distance no increase in worldly understanding can bridge.

This closing paradox recalls the broader Romantic preoccupation with the child as a figure of lost vision. William Wordsworth’s poetry, especially his reflections on early childhood, often imagines infancy and youth as periods of special closeness to spiritual reality. Hood’s poem shares Wordsworth’s sense that maturity can dim a former radiance. Yet the difference is crucial. Wordsworth frequently seeks compensations in memory, philosophical reflection, and the restorative power of nature. Hood is less assured of recovery. His poem does not rise into a grand account of how mature thought might redeem loss. Instead, it remains intimate, compressed, and wounded. Its emotional authority lies in its refusal to convert grief too quickly into consolation.

There is also a fruitful comparison with William Blake’s contrast between innocence and experience. Like Blake, Hood recognizes that innocence is not merely childish stupidity and experience is not simply wisdom. Each mode of perception has its costs and powers. Hood’s child sees flowers made of light and trees almost touching heaven; the adult sees more accurately but feels less joyfully. The poem therefore resists the easy educational narrative in which growing up means progressing from error to truth. Adult knowledge may be necessary, but it can carry alienation. The poem asks readers to acknowledge that a disenchanted view of the world may be factually correct while emotionally impoverished.

The repeated “I remember” acts as more than a structural marker. It is an incantation of attempted return. With each recurrence, the speaker re-enters a new region of the past: the home, the garden, the playground, the tall trees. The repetition conveys both persistence and failure. Memory repeatedly begins again because no single act of remembering is sufficient. The speaker must keep summoning images, perhaps hoping that accumulation will reconstruct the lost world. But the refrain also reminds us that all these scenes are mediated by the present voice. The speaker does not become the child again; he remains an adult saying “I remember.” The phrase thus contains both intimacy and distance.

Hood’s language deftly moves between colloquial simplicity and heightened poetic suggestion. Words such as “peeping,” “wink,” “lily-cups,” and “swing” have an almost childlike directness, while “borne my breath away,” “spirit flew in feathers,” and “farther off from heav’n” carry striking emotional and metaphysical force. This mixture is part of the poem’s achievement. It does not rely on elaborate abstraction to discuss alienation. Instead, it lets common childhood objects bear philosophical weight. A window becomes a frame for time; flowers become embodiments of radiance; a tree becomes a witness to duration; a swing becomes an image of freedom; a fir tree becomes a measure of spiritual distance.

The poem’s emotional movement is not a simple descent from joy to despair, although its final note is undeniably bleak. Each recollection contains its own fracture. The sunlight of the opening is immediately shadowed by death; the garden’s beauty is qualified by the knowledge of elapsed time; the swing’s freedom is contrasted with present heaviness; the towering firs lead to the recognition of spiritual estrangement. Hood therefore makes memory itself a divided experience. The past is not merely happy, nor is it merely painful. It is beautiful because it is gone, and painful because its beauty can still be felt. This is why the poem’s tenderness has such force: it does not suppress the violence of time.

The historical setting of the poem deepens its concern with private memory. In the early nineteenth century, Britain was undergoing rapid social change, including urban expansion, industrial transformation, and shifting assumptions about work, family, and individual identity. Hood does not directly describe factories, cities, or political upheaval here, but the poem’s retreat into the remembered home and garden gains significance in a culture increasingly conscious of change and displacement. The domestic environment becomes a sanctuary of origin, a place imagined as stable against the pressures of adult life. Yet even this sanctuary cannot escape time. The poem’s lasting power comes partly from this recognition: no cherished place, however lovingly preserved in memory, can protect the self from historical and personal transformation.

At the same time, “I Remember, I Remember” has endured because it speaks beyond its period. Readers continue to recognize the strange ache of returning, in thought or in person, to places associated with childhood. Many know the experience of seeing a familiar tree, house, or garden and discovering that its survival does not restore what has been lost. Hood gives that experience a concentrated lyric form. His speaker’s sorrow is particular, but the poem does not insist on a narrowly private grief. It invites readers to consider their own changing relation to home, nature, faith, family, and the earlier versions of themselves.

Ultimately, the poem is not an argument for remaining childish, nor is it a denunciation of knowledge. It is a profoundly moving exploration of what knowledge cannot replace. The adult speaker understands more about the physical world than the child did, but he cannot recover the child’s sense of proximity to light, air, birds, water, and heaven. Hood’s poetry preserves that vanished perception without pretending to restore it. The remembered world shines precisely because the poem knows it is unreachable. In this tension between vivid presence and irreversible absence lies the poem’s exquisite emotional resonance. “I Remember, I Remember” remains a masterpiece of lyric recollection because it makes us feel, with unusual clarity, how the past survives within us—and how deeply its survival can hurt.

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